


Being Neighbourly

by Ack_Emma



Series: The Ineffable Neighbours [1]
Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Aziraphale Has a Penis (Good Omens), Cheesy Porn Tropes, College freshman Aziraphale, Couch Sex, Crowley Has A Vulva (Good Omens), Erotic art as a come on, Experienced Crowley (Good Omens), F/M, Farm boy Aziraphale, Finger guns, Handyman work, Happy Ending, Hot neighbour pays handyman with sex trope, Innocent Aziraphale (Good Omens), Innocent blond gets schooled by experienced older woman, Light home maintenance really, Seductive neighbour Crowley, Turns out he LOVES school, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-13 15:22:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29280648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ack_Emma/pseuds/Ack_Emma
Summary: Innocent college freshman Aziraphale introduces himself to his seductive neighbour and offers to help out around her home.Antonia Crowley is glad for the help and makes sure to pay him properly for the work.
Relationships: Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens) & Original Character(s), Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Series: The Ineffable Neighbours [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2161452
Comments: 45
Kudos: 98
Collections: Ineffablexxx - Directors Cut





	1. Chapter 1

Aziraphale Fell knew he wasn't a worldly boy. Er, man. He supposed he should think of himself as a man, now, being 18 years old.

He’d grown up in the country, true, but people were people no matter where they were, weren’t they?

Perhaps neighbourliness was different in the city and that’s why he now found himself spread out on a couch with Ms. Crowley - Antonia - vigorously riding his cock.

Aziraphale had moved into his microflat just a week earlier. It was so small he could hardly turn around, but a comfy chair to sit in, a kettle on the hob, and a broad desk stacked with books made his new home cozy enough.

His mother had encouraged him to introduce himself to the neighbours, to become part of the community and make himself useful. After the last of the unpacking was done, Aziraphale had showered and carefully combed back his unruly, short blond hair. He changed himself into a clean white t-shirt and jeans, picked up his toolbox, and knocked on the door directly across the way.

Affixing a friendly grin to his face, Aziraphale’s smile twitched and faltered as the front door opened.

“Yes?”

A beautiful lady lounged sinuously against the edge of the door. In a tight sheath dress she was as thin and sharp as a razor, though everything about her seemed to twist and slink. A cocked hip, a curved neck revealed by intensely red hair pinned up. A coiling snake tattoo by her ear.

Aziraphale stammered and took a moment to reset himself. He thought he might meet other students like himself in this building. This wasn’t some young, university lass his age but a real, proper woman.

“Hello.” He tried to smile reassuringly, though whether that was for her benefit or his he wasn’t sure. 

“Uh, hi.” She lifted a languorous hand in greeting and waited expectantly.

“I moved in across the way last week. Seven days ago. A nice day. All the days here have been nice, actually.” Oh, he was babbling. “My name’s Aziraphale.”

“Hullo, Aziraphale.” Her voice had a teasing quality which reached her eyes as she looked him up and down. They were as gold as a cat’s, and mesmerizing when focused on him.

“I came to London to attend school and thought I’d introduce myself to my new neighbours, Ms...”

“Crowley,” she supplied, inclining her head in greeting.

“Ms. Crowley- ”

“But you can call me Antonia.”

Well that was awfully familiar. “Antonia?” Aziraphale repeated, bewildered.

“You don’t like it?” she laughed. Tilting her head back, Aziraphale saw a rough, chain-link necklace shift out from under the neckline of her dress. The dull steel was vaguely forbidding, lying against her warm, coppery skin.

Aziraphale raised his empty hand placatingly. “No! I love it! Antonia, a name of Roman origin. Fine place, Rome. They did remarkable things to oysters.”

Antonia raised her eyebrows and asked, “is that why you’re at my door, Aziraphale? To do remarkable things to oysters?” Her face was open and curious, except for the curve of her smile.

Oh, why had he brought up aphrodisiacs? He was foundering on the rocks of iniquity with this introduction. He wished he could vanish.

“Ah, I brought tools!” Aziraphale held up the toolbox to show her. “I’m good with my hands. I thought the neighbourly thing to do would be to see if you needed any help around your home.”

Antonia turned her head back and looked around her flat. She sucked her teeth as she considered the space. “Well, I do have trouble with balance. I’ve a few lightbulbs to switch out and a picture or two to hang.”

“I could drill a few holes for you!” Aziraphale brightened.

With a smirk, Antonia gestured him in.

Aziraphale stepped forward and stared wide-eyed at the dark, stylish decor inside. Her flat was large, with an eclectic mix of statuary displayed on pedestals. The charcoal walls were stark and seemed less like the boundaries outlining the space of the flat than a canvas for Antonia to paint across, a burst of red colour moving about the dark space. Aziraphale trailed behind her, trying not to notice the hypnotic swing of her hips.

The black fabric of her dress stretched tantalizingly over her arse as she bent over to pick up a gilded chair. It must have been a heavy piece of furniture because she rocked back and forward a bit, lifting it. Realizing that he should help, Aziraphale peeled his eyes off her backside and hurried over to take it from her.

“The bulbs are burned out there and there,” Antonia pointed. She raked him with her gaze as he moved the chair and climbed onto it.

“In London to study, you say?” she questioned.

Aziraphale focused on cupping the burned-out bulb carefully with his hand, twisting it just so. “Literature,” he answered, staring up at the light fixture.

“Interesting choice for a farm boy,” Antonia returned archly.

Aziraphale blushed, that she had clocked him so quickly. He supposed his jeans were work worn and it was easy to see the roughness of his hands.

“A passion of mine, nonetheless.”

Aziraphale handed Antonia the old bulb and waited for her to bring a new one. Her fingers touched his as she handed it over and the thrill of that contact made Aziraphale want to chase her hand. Instead, he tried to concentrate on the new bulb, screwing it in just right.

When that was done he climbed down and carried the chair to the next light, to repeat the process.

“What kind of farm did you grow up on?”

“Mixed. Cattle and sheep, fruit trees, some crops. Normally I’d be ploughing right now.” Aziraphale allowed himself a moment of wistfulness and missed the twitching of Antonia’s lips, trying to hold in a smile.

The second bulb replaced, Aziraphale stepped down from the chair. “There we are. Let there be light!” He gave a little flourish with his hand.

Antonia regarded him with raised eyebrows, before turning around, walking toward the hallway, and snapping her fingers. Half the lights in the flat dimmed.

“I’ll go get that painting.”

Aziraphale took the opportunity to study some of the statues on display. The animal-shaped ones didn’t strike him one way or another, but the large one with entwined, winged creatures was fascinating.

A warm hand massaged his arm to get his attention. Aziraphale startled to find Antonia standing very close to him.

“Here’s the painting,” she said, holding it up.

Aziraphale started to flush as he studied the art. A red-haired goddess sat reclined on a bench, long legs outstretched. The draped fabric of her dress was copious but arranged to cover very little of her. Her head was thrown back, her face an expression of pure bliss. A cherubic blond kneeled before her, staring up at her worshipfully while caressing the goddess’ feet. His clothing was accomplishing even less, in terms of maintaining his modesty. It was terribly erotic.

“I’ll show you where you can drill a hole for me,” Antonia said. She chose a section of wall beside her fireplace, and Aziraphale dutifully mounted the painting for her.

“Are you an artist?” he asked. Perhaps a little conversation would head off the restless craving that was starting to build in his body.

“I run an art gallery, actually,” Antonia replied.

Wishing to be positive and supportive but not knowing what, exactly, to say, Aziraphale went for, “how interesting!”

“It is,” Antonia purred. “There’s something of a talent to knowing when people like what they see. And want to have it.”

The way she said it made his ears burn. Aziraphale supposed he should be popping along. He replaced the gilded chair and started to take his leave when Antonia pulled out a fashionable handbag and started to rummage around in it. “Let me pay you something for your trouble.”

“No, thank you” Aziraphale protested. “I couldn’t possibly. It wouldn’t be neighbourly.”

Antonia withdrew her hand from the bag and eyed him consideringly. Aziraphale swallowed and tried to decide what to do with his hands.

“Maybe I could pay you in another way. A more neighbourly way.” Antonia sauntered forward, stopping a few feet in front of him. “You moved here for an education?” she said, meaningfully. Aziraphale’s face grew hot. She stepped even closer. “Has anyone ever taught you about- ”

“Love?” Aziraphale blurted out, an overwhelmed mess of panic, arousal, and earnestness.

Antonia smiled lazily. “Pleasure.”

Aziraphale shook his head and, before she could misconstrue the gesture, stated, “I would like someone-” his voice cracked but he looked at her full on, “I would like you to.”

Without breaking eye contact, Antonia stepped back and with impressive flexibility twisted her arm behind herself to unzip the entire length of her dress. Grasping the neckline in both hands she shrugged and pulled the dress forward and down, stepping fluidly out of the garment.

She was entirely bare underneath. Aziraphale had no time to take in her sudden nakedness, because she came right up to him, tilted her head slightly, and brought her mouth a hair’s breadth away from his.

Aziraphale dove in and kissed her eagerly. Antonia snaked her arms around his neck and he pulled her closer to press everything of theirs more tightly together. 

It was heat and desire and the promise of ecstasy to kiss her, and as Aziraphale parted his lips to moan she slipped her tongue into his mouth and let him fully taste her. Antonia ran her hands through his hair, cupping his head gently before using her hands to stroke his neck and chest, admiring the muscles he’d built through farm labour.

“Let me show you one way we can enjoy ourselves,” she suggested seductively.

“Please. Anything.” If he exploded from even more enjoyment than this, Aziraphale thought, it would be worth it.

Pressing soft kisses to his mouth, Antonia undid the fastenings at his waist and dropped his trousers to the floor. She disengaged and walked down a hallway leading further into her flat. “I’ll be right back,” she said. “Sit on something sturdy. And spacious.” 

The couch seemed the only piece of furniture to fit the bill so Aziraphale eased himself the rest of the way out of his trousers and lowered himself carefully onto that. Antonia reappeared and efficiently rolled a condom down his ridiculously overeager erection. Gentle fingertips pushed on his chest until he leaned fully back and he watched as Antonia climbed into his lap and straddled his broad thighs.

“This position is rather good, I think, because we can see so much of each other, touch so much of each other,” she explained.

She tilted her pelvis to rub the hot wetness between her legs against his cock. Aziraphale let his head drop back and planted his hands on the couch seat in order to steady himself. Watching the thatch of dark curls work itself up and down the length of him was incredible.

Antonia smiled knowingly, but not unkindly, as she increased the pressure and started to breathe more heavily, herself. “You can touch me with your hands, your mouth,” she instructed.

“Where?”

“Anywhere I have skin, angel.”

Aziraphale took her hand and kissed the palm reverently. He trailed feather-light kisses up her arm until he had levered himself high enough up to kiss her collarbone. The chain necklace seemed even more out-of-place and ominous, when there was no clothing left to cover up her loveliness.

“May I remove this?” Aziraphale asked.

Antonia bent her head to let him and Aziraphale took the opportunity to also kiss her mouth again. Antonia made small noises of pleasure as he held her at the waist and let his lips and tongue roam, tasting the skin on her neck, her shoulders, her chest. He interrupted the rolling of her hips to lift her higher so he could kiss and lick the small, pert breasts that had been swaying temptingly, just out of his reach.

“The nipples, ah! Can be quite sensitive,” Antonia told him breathlessly.

Aziraphale gave one more enthusiastic lick before taking a soft, warm nipple in his mouth and sucking greedily. He gave similar attention to the other side, enjoying how Antonia arched her back, presenting herself more fully to him.

When Aziraphale came up for breath Antonia advised, “I’m warmed up and ready. Would you like to be inside me?”

Aziraphale did so Antonia held onto his shoulders for balance. She rocked her pelvis so the head of Aziraphale’s cock dragged a line through the slickness from her clit to her entrance before pressing into her. Aziraphale groaned and panted as she lowered herself onto his entire length then paused to let him calm down a bit.

“Sometimes it’s nice to go slow,” Antonia teased, lifting herself up with excruciating control. She came down gradually, driving him mad as her body took him in again, inch by inch. “Does it feel good to go slow right now?”

“Fast,” Aziraphale begged. “Go fast, please.” He desperately wanted more of her quickly, immediately, now.

Antonia sped up her movements, riding him more urgently. Aziraphale slid his blunt fingers into her stunning hair, and she obliged him by letting it down to frame her face and tumble down her shoulders.

“You’re so beautiful,” he gasped. “Antonia, I want, I…”

He held her hips and started to thrust up into her, needing more sensation, more pleasure, more Antonia. Antonia tightened her hold on his right shoulder and slid her other hand down the front of her crotch, rubbing her fingers up and down while closing her eyes and biting her lip.

With a particularly out-of-control jerk of his hips, the heightened tension in Aziraphale’s body released itself in an incredible burst of pleasure. It peaked then came down as he grunted and thrusted and gave himself over to it.

Antonia ground her pelvis into him more forcefully and a few moments later he felt her tighten and spasm around him, riding out her own climax with him inside her.

Once Antonia had milked every drop of gratification from him she wrapped her arms loosely around him and laid her head on his shoulder. They both panted and rested for a few minutes, then Antonia carefully eased herself off and showed Aziraphale how to hold himself to keep the condom on. She led him to the washroom where she removed the protection carefully and wiped the excess wetness from their bodies. Aziraphale regarded her with no small amount of wonderment and helped her back into her dress before pulling on his trousers.

Despite his bashfulness and inexperience, one thing Aziraphale knew how to do was have manners. He followed her cues and when she walked him to the front door he took Antonia’s hand and kissed the back of it.

“Thank you,” he said, looking at her adoringly. “You are an excellent teacher and it was a pleasure to meet you. Even without further lessons I would be glad to fix things around your flat anytime.”

He picked up his toolbox, smiled warmly at her, and returned to his place across the hall. Antonia watched him go with amusement.

Well that had been a satisfying diversion for a weekend afternoon. With some minor home maintenance thrown in. From the besotted look in Aziraphale’s eyes Antonia guessed she’d see him again a few more times before he discovered the other bright and beautiful young people at college and turned his attention to them. She lit the fireplace and poured herself a few fingers of scotch to enjoy while admiring the painting.

“Always nice to meet a new neighbour,” she wiggled her eyebrows at the goddess, and smirked.


	2. Chapter 2

_FIFTY YEARS LATER_

Antonia walked back into the dining room just in time to hear the wrap up.

“And that’s how your Nana and I met,” Aziraphale beamed.

Ten scandalized faces around the Christmas dinner table stared open-mouthed at Aziraphale before turning their eyes to Antonia. Then the youngest, Harry, bolted from the table with hands over their ears and a horrified yell. Mal’s new partner, who she’d also met as a college freshman, burst into uproarious laughter. She had to rest her head on the table, she was so overcome.

“Aziraphale!” Antonia hissed. “You can’t tell the grandchildren that story!”

“Well, they asked. And it’s a magical story!”

“I debauched you as an innocent!”

“Darling,” he took her hand and kissed her fingers. His eyes were soft and only for her. “I fell in love with you at first sight. Besides, they can handle it, the grandchildren are all older than I was at the time.”

At that, Antonia’s face pinched with distress. “Ngk.”

She turned back to look specifically at their children, some of whom did not return eye contact as they’d chosen to face-palm at that moment.

Continuing to hold her hand, Aziraphale wiggled with delight and dug into his pear cobbler. Antonia reached for her wine glass and took a healthy swig before attempting to justify her past actions to her family.

“It was ineffable,” she explained.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These dorks. I told them this was supposed to be porn but they insisted that they were in love.


End file.
